By Joe Torosian
“The seasons come and go, Handsman…You go, Ritter goes, Ledesma will go, Coach Aberdeen will go…Only the fat guys get to stick around.”—Grip Teague
Does anybody here not eat hot dogs in real life but puts no restriction on themselves when having a Dodger Dog at Chavez Ravine?
I’m that guy. Even in my youth–when my arteries didn’t matter–I wouldn’t eat a hot dog unless it was Hebrew National or Nathan’s. However, at Dodger Stadium, I must have two grilled dogs slathered in mustard and onions.
Absolutely love the smell of that combination. Of course, to offset the cost, I may have to shop at AM-PM for two weeks.
The finances required for two Dodger Dogs, a bag of peanuts, and a non-alcoholic beverage are only bad compared to the cost of a single brewski at Casa Azul…Jubilee Dunbar!
I only hit the snack bar once, the dudes pounding the suds they’re chain drinking…to pay for all that beer, you need a co-signer.
I’m not being a prude, it’s the dough. And I’m not cheap. It’s just that I don’t see the value in certain things.
Like J.J. Watt…(“Do they speak English in Watt?”). I don’t know why everyone is so enamored with that old dude…And I say old only in football-miles.
The projection says Watt (“Say Watt, again! I dare you! I double-dare you!”) should command 2-years, $25-million ($12.5 avg). But did you know that Arizona Cardinals free agent Haason Reddick is projected to be worth 1-year at $8.5-mil? The former inside linebacker was moved outside in 2020 and recorded 12.5 sacks, 15 tackles for losses without playing next to Aaron Donald.
I’m not saying Reddick’s the answer. I’m just saying there are many options out there with young legs ready to make a splash alongside Donald.
One year at $8.5 versus 2-years for $25-rocks?… It’s not my money, but I still want the better value.
The best value in the NFL–like eating at home instead of Dodger Stadium—is down draft.
I’m not interested in saving a few bucks if it means John Johnson III will walk away. But of all the Rams I can see leaving, it is Johnson because there’s depth at safety.
Jordan Fuller—2020 6th rd. Ohio St.—was fantastic as a rookie. Then there’s the guy everyone forgot about the second half of last season, Taylor Rapp.
And then… there’s the guy, Terrell Burgess—2020 3rd rd. Utah—who plays not only safety but can also line up as a slot-corner.
(So long, Troy Hill.)
When Les Snead calls me later today, I’m going to say: “Les, bubby…let Josh Reynolds walk, don’t sign a wide receiver, and make Van Jefferson your third-wideout. Save the money on Reynolds, Hill’s replacement, and Leonard Floyd. Go after a cheaper Edge guy, like Haason Reddick, and use the rest to bring back Johnson.”
(Note to Rams fans: Remember the name: Terrell Lewis on the Edge.)
If you’re an Angels fan…I understand it’s hard to shed a tear for a guy making $37-million, but isn’t there something cruel about Mike Trout playing the next ten seasons in Anaheim?
For the sake of love, don’t you want him to go somewhere with a chance to win? Like, for example, the New York Mets?
Since we’re talking about the Halos…Albert Pujols is in the last year of his 10-year deal. I understand it’s a sore subject since he’s making $30-million this summer…and hasn’t had an OPS above 800 since 2012.
(The average MLB OPS is .758…but $30-million is not an average salary.)
With that said..when was the last time the Angels developed a legitimate starting pitcher? Try 2006 when Jered Weaver joined the club for the next 11 seasons…After that?
Being an Angels fan must be like hearing the coach/manager of your favorite team say (six-months before the season begins): “We’re going to be young this year.”
If you don’t know what “We’re going to be young this year” translates to…then you haven’t spent enough time around sports.
Speaking of young…Los Angeles Lakers forward Kyle Kuzma turns 26 this season. The team extended him, but with Anthony Davis out for a month, isn’t this Kuzma’s moment? Isn’t this his opportunity to shine? He’s got so much talent, but he disappears faster than I do when the bill’s brought to the table.
I may not be cheap…but I still like to save a buck when I can. After all, Mookie Betts is on the Dodgers payroll for the remainder of the century. Who knows what a grilled dog will be going for in the seasons to come?
The Dude abides…
1 Corinthians 8:8
Joe T. is the author of “Tangent Dreams: A High School Football Novel” … “Temple City & The Company of The Ages” … “The Dead Bug Tales” … “The Dark Norm” & “FaithViews for Storm Riders”…all five available through Amazon.com.
Follow Joe on Twitter @joet13b
MeWe: Joe Torosian
Be sure to read:
The Saxon Top 25—Every Monday (College Bball)
The Urena Express—Every Wednesday (MLB)