Kavorka!
By Joe Torosian
“I love you too much to ever start liking you
So let’s just let the story kinda end
I love you too much to ever start liking you
So don’t expect me to be your friend.”—Lobo
Kick it!
Are you kidding me?
I thought J.J. Watt was chasing a ring?
I don’t begrudge anybody making money. Doing endorsements, being rich–I have ZERO problems with rich people–but at this point in Watt’s career, doesn’t he have enough money?
The most important item on his agenda—professionally—should be a Super Bowl appearance. And he signs with the Arizona Cardinals?
Okay.
Watt signing with the Cardinals is like the old beer commercial where the construction guys work all day…and then complain about being served light beer. “Have you ever tasted light beer?”
Yeah, it’s called Watt signing with Arizona for 2-years and 31-rocks—23 of it guaranteed.
As a Rams fan, I’m thrilled. Watt is 32 with lots of tread on his tires. He only recorded five sacks in 2020, and Pro Football Focus rates him the 18th best edge rusher in the league. Free Agent Haason Reddick, who played for the Cardinals last season, was ranked 11th by PFF.
(Someone from Stan Kroenke’s office should be giving Reddick a tour of Manhattan Beach this week.)
If I were a Cardinals fan, I’d be infuriated. Even if Watt plays all 17 games in 2021, or 15 of 17, he’s not J.J. Watt anymore. And as more teams figure out how to play Kyler Murray, his ceiling isn’t going to go much higher (no short joke intended).
Murray is a purer, more natural passer than Lamar Jackson. But after two seasons, it’s clear Murray doesn’t have the FOG Factor (Fear of God) in his repertoire as Jackson does. He needs help offensively…Along with a CB and DT on defense, so he doesn’t have to pull a DeAndre Hopkins out of the hat every week.
Still, I’m delighted the Cards depleted significant cap-space for Watt.
After the Dodgers’ Trevor Bauer gave up a hit to the first batter he faced today…I went to Twitter to search for FireTrevorBauer.com because it seemed like a logical Dodger fan reaction.
Speaking of which, I have no idea how I’m seeing Dodger games this Spring. I haven’t changed my VPN or hired a former Soviet nuclear engineer to rig my cable account–but I’m getting my Ned Colletti. I’ve had MLB.com for years, but Dodger broadcasts were still blacked-out as far away as Atascadero.
What happened?
As a big fan of Cactus League baseball, I’m not a big fan of 7-inning baseball. I feel like if you’re paying to see a Major League club’s free agents and no-chance-in-heck prospects…you should at least get 9-innings worth of nothing.
And the thrill of taking picture after picture of Andy Villanueva working his diet at stadiums from Peoria to Tempe Diablo only improves when the clock goes 27-outs.
And then, every once in a while, you find that Obnoxious Giants Fan (David Nordel) who pines for the days of Candlestick Park. And the glory of a 100-loss Giants season while depriving a 90-win Dodger team of a post-season privilege.
I’d do homework for a month before going to Spring Training. Nothing’s better than starting a casual conversation with a fellow fan and knowing the chapter and verse of #96’s bio—even without a name on his back or a face on the scoreboard.
“Who’s #96?”—Voice on the phone
“No one who’ll be missed.”—Winston Wolf
Last Add Spring Training: No, no matter what anyone may think, I was not the guy behind home plate at yesterday’s Dodger game wearing the Mets hat.
It’s not because I’m bitter that The Saxon Top 25 does more business on my website than Fanview does. But right now, I’m not overtly jazzed about the NCAA Tournament.
Should I be?
Okay, I’ll make a sight-unseen prediction…Gonzaga gets bounced in or around the Sweet 16. I’ve had no vision, just Wikipedia.
The Dude abides…
1,176
1 Corinthians 13:6-7
Joe T. is the author of “Tangent Dreams: A High School Football Novel” … “Temple City & The Company of The Ages” … “The Dead Bug Tales” … “The Dark Norm” & “FaithViews for Storm Riders”…all five available through Amazon.com.
www.JoeTorosian.com
jtbank1964@yahoo.com
Follow Joe on Twitter @joet13b
Instagram: @joet13b
Parler: @Jtbank1964
MeWe: Joe Torosian
Be sure to read:
The Saxon Top 25—Every Monday (College Bball)
The Urena Express—Every Wednesday (MLB)
