Fanview: February 16, 2021

Kavorka!

By Joe Torosian

“Everybody wants to be on a championship team, but nobody wants to come to practice.”—Bobby Knight

Kick it!

The cold doesn’t bother me…I don’t know why everyone’s making a fuss.

Of all the privileges our culture is looking into, I think it’s time to scrutinize “Left-Handed Privilege.” It’s a runaway train and grossly unfair. They get an extra step to first base. They get the shortest porches in the stadiums, shoot a basketball better, and get special scissors made for them…Oh, and they’re likely to make a lot of money…

Understand me…Last week, I said I wouldn’t want J.J. Watt unless the Rams could pay him Morgan Fox money. What I meant to say was if the Rams were willing to pay significant money for Watt, I’d rather see them give it to Leonard Floyd.

…But I wouldn’t break the bank for Leonard Floyd either. The key to being an edge rusher for the Rams is the front line and a dude named Aaron Donald.

Every time Anthony Davis goes down during a game, it looks like he’s been shot by a high-powered rifle. AD hits the floor, and there are flashbacks of Bernard King, Ron Harper, Shaun Livingston…even Louisville’s Kevin Ware back in 2013. So, it was interesting to see Davis walk (not carted) off the court and now out until mid-March with a calf-strain.

This injury reveals a significant reason for the Lakers title last summer. And The Bubble and the Pandemic should probably be given a pro-rated share of the winner’s purse and maybe a ring. 

The stoppage (while bad for the world) gave LeBron James and Davis a significant break from the game. Davis is always hurt and avoided his annual hobbling while James’ old bones were dealt zero air travel and a whole lot of rest.

Now James is logging big minutes, Davis is being Davis…and it will be interesting to see how the back half of this season plays out…But why am I mentioning this to you?

You’d rather talk about NFL quarterbacks…and so would I.

If you’re Carson Wentz and want out of Philly so bad, restructure your contract. It makes it easier for the Eagles to deal you while greasing the skids for the Indianapolis Colts to acquire you. Is it that hard?

The Chicago Bears are in on the Wentz talks. I get it, but I think Sam Darnold would be easier and cheaper to acquire from the New York Jets. And if you’re in ChiTown, and you’re willing to mortgage the future, why not give the Seattle Seahawks a call?

The Urena Express hits tomorrow with Spring Training picks. I won’t say who Urena likes (big surprise)…but he seems to be having a side affair with the New York Yankees. If I was a Dodgers fan, I might think twice about going to a game with him this season. I’d test his loyalty by asking him to pay for parking.

Not only the cost but the idea of giving Frank McCourt a dime has to grind at any real Dodgers fan.

Speaking of Baseball…In the I Should Have Learned To Play The Guitar Department: Brett Anderson, lefty, former Dodger, just signed a 1-year, $2.5-million deal with the Milwaukee Brewers. Since 2009, 12 seasons, Anderson has pitched in 198 games… That’s 16.5 games a season…His unofficial total career earnings are: $56,460,000 … Left-Handed Privilege strikes again.

I should have learned to play the guitar. I should have learned to bang them drums…

Last Add NBA: Give me Bradley Beal…So much fun to watch.

In honor of Loyal Fanview Reader Jim “His Arroyo Baldness” Singiser, I sat through “Draft Day” last night. I did a breakdown on how the Cleveland Browns faired in 2014. 

They went 7-9. Their quarterback “Bryan Drew” only threw 12 touchdown passes against 13 interceptions. The leading rusher “Ray Jennings” only averaged 3.9-yds per-carry and finished with just 673-yards in 14 games. And he only cracked the starting lineup four times.

“Vontae Mack”? Coach Penn converted him into a defensive end, and he recorded only five sacks.

The draft picks they took from the Pancake-Eating-Motherblanker in Seattle, Tom Michaels?  They were: Vontae Mack, Ray Jennings, and Corey Coleman (2016, & out of the league by 2018). They also took Cody Kessler from USC, who eventually replaced Bryan Drew.

(In 2017, John Dorsey became the GM and drafted Myles Garrett, and began correcting the Weaver-Penn disaster).

In 2015 Coach Penn went 3-13 and was fired along with General Manager Sonny Weaver, who became a stay-at-home dad at 61. Last I heard, his wife, Ally, was wondering what she got herself into.

The Dude abides…
1,171
1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Joe T. is the author of “Tangent Dreams: A High School Football Novel” … “Temple City & The Company of The Ages” … “The Dead Bug Tales” … “The Dark Norm” & “FaithViews for Storm Riders”…all five available through Amazon.com.

www.JoeTorosian.com
jtbank1964@yahoo.com
Follow Joe on Twitter @joet13b
Instagram: @joet13b
Parler: @Jtbank1964
MeWe: Joe Torosian

Be sure to read:
The Saxon Top 25—Every Monday (College Bball)
The Urena Express—Every Wednesday (MLB)

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